An update? Are you quite sure?

So what's been happening in the wonderfully awesome life of Le Jerm? For one thing, he no longer resides in Montreal. Why? Did he go ahead and make a new city, calling it Awesomeville? No, nothing so amazing. Yet. It's on his list of things to do like eating tasty food, meeting new people, world domination and rescuing cute, fuzzy animals. In fact, he moved to a city its residents like to call Toronto.

But again... Why? He moved because he couldn't stand the sight of you. No, not you. Not you either. He's actually quite fond of you. As for you there, well... He hasn't publicly declared that he doesn't like you so you're safe. For now anyway. Rather, it's because of the obnoxious one in the back there with the haircut that screams "FRUITY!!". Actually, he moved because he was having quite some trouble finding a job. Yes, it actually happens to awesome people. It's the recession so nobody escapes. He's hoping for better luck in job hunting and, if the opportunity presents itself, to become even MORE awesome by taking more courses. You know, something along the lines of welding, people manipulation, plumbing or even auto mechanic. Oh and about the obnoxious one? He wasn't kidding.

Again, why? That's simple, really. If he's going to create Awesomeville from scratch by himself, he's going to need to know some basic skills. And no, he's not hiring henchmen. They have a bad reputation for being complete idiots who can't even hit a target at point blank range with a rocket launcher. That and he doesn't want them stealing his recipes for yummy food. They ARE rather hard to find nowadays.

So what is he doing in the meantime? He's hitting the town on a daily basis to try and understand how its public transit system works. He is quite pleased with there being AC on every aspect of the public transit system. He is, however, quite displeased (read: abhors) the price tag associated with such a travel method. Note: Make public transit free when Operation TO Takeover has been achieved.

He is also quite taken in by how inexpensive the food is. A bowl of soup noodle AND a glass of soy milk for only $4.50? Or perhaps a chicken steak meal complete with rice, deep fried sweet potato, fried egg (still runny, of course), a nice side salad, a soup and a drink for $7.00? And of course, there's the awesome Chinese supermarket dubbed T&T (not to be confused with the explosive compound TNT) with its fully stocked cooked food counter. He managed to nab a dozen giant dumplings for about $3.00. MMM... dumplings...

So will he ever go back to Montreal? Only if you behave. No, not talking to the obnoxious one. He's never coming back for you. He might be inclined to visit from time to time. You know, during a holiday or perhaps when there's a long weekend. He'll think about it. In the meantime, you should all definitely prepare feasts for when he arrives so he can stuff himself.

However, should the need to visit him overwhelm any self-control you have (and it should), then please locate one of these handy-dandy teleportation pads pictured below.

Please keep in mind that there may be some lag due to the system still being in its beta testing stages. Therefore, anybody using them should be patient and stand there like the good friend that are. Le Jerm would quite appreciate the time and effort expended on such a venture.

Now to get some rest. Quick advice before logging off: make sure your hairdresser doesn't talk you into trying out the new "stylish" haircut.

PS: Le Jerm was not present to type this message to you wonderful people (again, excluding the obnoxious one) so his laptop did the work, hence everything being in the 3rd person. And no, Skynet is not becoming a reality nor is it taking over. Skynet's got NOTHING on Le Jerm's laptop.